Late last night, as I sat doing the usual… G-talking with "My First Visitor", I blurted something that has been playing my irritant ever since. Something to the effect of –
When we finally meet, you’ll be glad we remained “just friends”.
I was immediately snubbed by this somebody who could only have been a true friend.
What if I said you’re better off without seeing me or meeting me? How would you feel?
And that was the second when it hit me like a bullet. I realized that I would have probably run away from such a person. Who wants to know somebody that has no sense of self-worth? And even if I had stuck around, it would perhaps be more out of pity than willingness.
As the dismay of cutting out such a sorry figure gave way to some deep thinking through yesterday night and today, I’m finding myself face to face with perhaps the biggest reality of my existence.
I’ve always always tried to make up for my internal demons with external laurels.
I’ve always tried to find happiness in the world outside me… thinking that if this or that were to happen to me, then I’d be happy for good. Clearly, it hasn’t worked. Because despite the most extraordinary changes in my external world, my insides are still waiting for their dawn. Only now, the hope of a ray has got tied around a new pillar of expectation from the universe… yet again.
Somewhere along the hours of self-analysis, I vaguely remembered a term that has now found its way to the title of this post. EFT. I didn’t know what it meant. I just had a hazy memory that during my visits to a psychologist 2 years ago (in pursuit of happiness!), I had been advised to start using EFT on myself. “It can work wonders”, she had said, “and I just know that you would not find any way until you work upon yourself with EFT”. For various reasons, I had discontinued those visits, the major one being a belief that once I had achieved this bodily change I had been pining for, all would be sorted – without AND within. EFT or no EFT.
So, 2 years from then, today, I typed into Google Search – E F T, and discovered that it expands to – Emotional Freedom Technique – a therapy that involves two important things. Specific Acupuncture points on one’s body which are to be tapped with one’s finger tips. And an Affirmation statement, which has to be spoken aloud as one does this tapping.
Honestly, it looks quite silly to start with. And I now remembered that I had written it off as silly even 2 years back. But today, somehow, I am ready to have faith… What got me hooked was the fact that EFT is supposed to be self-healing; and it’s about healing self.
The Acupuncture points are technicalities (that is not to say that they’re not significant). The Affirmation, on the other hand, involves the creative writing of a statement through which one acknowledges one’s flaws in the first phrase, and then, goes on to announce self-love despite all those flaws, in the concluding phrase. The ‘flaw’ doesn’t need to fall under any defined brackets. It could range from a physical ailment to a psychological stress to even issues of weight. The idea is to basically work on a person’s self-image and ingrain self-love in them.
An example would be: Even though I think I’m fat and ugly, I choose to deeply and completely love and accept myself (or… I choose to feel beautiful and loved).
The technique is supposed to aid in discovering and tackling the deep dark issues that lie buried in the roots of these superficial problems. It forms a way to unravel these layers one by one, and eventually helps one love and accept oneself despite every ‘shortcoming’.
No. I’m not an ambassador of EFT. At least not just yet. But in the coming few days, weeks, or maybe, months, I’ll keep updating this space with my experiences through this seemingly remarkable therapy.
EFT: Day 1
Yes, I gave it a try today. The first statement I felt I needed was this:
Even though I feel EFT will not be able to help me without a therapist, I choose to help EFT work on me.
Actually, I feared that all my attempts might be in vain without a professional EFT therapist around. And interestingly, this first round did help me allay those concerns to some extent. [I was quite loud and passionate as I spoke that sentence]
As I tried to form the next Affirmation in my mind, the words started to prick my eyes. I couldn’t believe that I was hurting already…
To acknowledge pain and the source of it is a huge step towards inner peace. EFT experts claim that the therapy is all about accepting yourself as a whole, the pain, the bruises all included.
I don’t know what the tears meant, and I won’t let my mind run to conclusions, lest I should end up speaking too soon.
But yeah, the name sounds just right to me – Emotional Freedom! I think that’s one wish we must all add to the list of wishes we send out on birthdays, anniversaries and all those happy day celebrations!
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